Saturday, July 13, 2013
T is for TRAYVON, not Target practice.
T is for Trayvon Martin. Aka that black kid that got shot in Florida. Aka son of Ms. Sabrina Fulton and Mr. Tracy Martin. Aka the A through Z of lies told to make death reserved for you in particular, King, if you dare walk down the sidewalk upright in your full stature and bronzed skin on a rainy night in the south, wearing you hooded crown.
A. This is for Africa, your source and your strength so profound they had to lash it off your back since your great great greatest of fathers.
B for boy child, because becoming a man was supposed to be your mother's joy, your brother's keeper, your sister's protector and your father's legacy.
C for country. Not yours, though you built it. Not theirs, for they stole it, but GOD'S. For everything under the sun........ yet the lines are drawn and walls erected around gated "communities" you were never meant to be a part of.
D
E
F is for future. There is a gap there now that you were not allowed to fill. Dead or alive. And our ears ring deaf from the sounds of black souls mourning.
Gun. Gun. Gun. Laws to protect its rights to bear but not your right to life.
H is for Hoodie...... or Hijab. For your sister Shaima Alawadi who lost her life too covering her head from the constant blows. H. For my heart os Heavy
I. I am. I am. I am. I am NOT a criminal. Suspicious? I am the closest thing to the Divine. THIS is what scares you.
J is for Justice. A concept understood by men, not beasts, and an animals true nature always comes out.
K is for king. WE will call you by your real name and proper title.
L is for love. Love. Love. Perhaps through all this we might find comfort in that being the only thing that matters, even when there is no breathe.
M is for Moment as I wonder how you must have felt in your final one. Was it familiar? Had it happened before in a former life, little black boy?
N. Nigger.
O
P
Quarantined. To the cotton fields then the projects then the jail house..... then the white house.
R is for Reminder..... for Her. Her who you maybe hadn't met yet. Her who one day would have the half to your whole and the womb to your re-birth. Alone now, she is still here and you are gone.
T is for TRAYVON, not target Practice.
I can't go through the rest. Please rest now.
Friday, April 13, 2012
You are divine, wear your crown.
Sunday, September 5, 2010
FUCK BUDDY.

Intimacy real. An honest friend. A dream drawn out and a fear shot down every day. Someone who can sense a change in my face when I try to hide and know that strong as I am, at this very moment i feel lost and just need to be held. A call to make sure I got home safe. A hand on the small of my back or in mine walking down the street. Someone to make me want to break all my own rules about who not to trust and what not to say and when not to give in.
Breakfast. Watching you shave in the morning before breakfast. Watching you fix the tv after breakfast. Watching you do anything. A night out just to go dancing then home to a bath big enough for the both of us and a bed with a your side and mine that's somewhere in the middle. A move when I move, a look when I look, a fight that's fair. Space when I need it.
Quiet conversations with your index finger and the scar on my left knee. A smell I recognize. A prayer said together for this thing to grow between young lady love and a man still trying to find his way. "For where two or more are gathered..."
Laughter! And more of that. And more still. Please and Thank you. A family blessing. A long day at work and someone to tell it to. A book read out loud, a shared meal on one warm plate, a movie in the dark, a good nights sleep in your button down shirt and your arms.
My name said a way I've never heard it before. A fleeting moment where i think "what if" I had your daughter years from now. A gift, a photograph, a song that reminded me of you today. Knowing that you'll still be here tomorrow......
So no. I don't want a Fuck Buddy.
Sunday, January 24, 2010
Daily Bread.

He walked like hip-hop hip-hop hip-hop. . . . like that.
With a swag that made a beat with each foot tap and
moved the girl to sway and swing her child birth hips
more than she ever knew she could.
He would woo her with his tone.
You see, it was deep and wide and made the
earth creep each time he spoke of truth, or Miss Angelou
or Rwanda and how he cried when he watched it waste.
His skin was a shade of black been kissed by the sun.
From birth, he kept his milk teeth pearl white and his
smile was as bright as his mind. Oh his mind where he lived,
was so vast it knew things before they knew of themselves.
He taught his teachers. They thanked but hated him, named
him “Man of the Year”, twice.
But he was afraid of heights. Not the type where you're in
the sky but when you're up so high full of life that one day
it may all go wrong and STOP. Fall down hard from grace
and lose shape as you lay flat with no air left to fill your head.
His pa died of him self. It was when he was a young boy and
he would not talk of it, she would not ask. He pent it up til a lump
grew in his leg. They took it out, it came back and spread.
So he let no one close to his chest and kept all loves at arms
length as she dream't of them all,
lay still in white beds. . . . .
Sunday, January 17, 2010
Customary Charisma

First I see his clean white North Star, old-man shoes, propped up by wheelchair stilts, then his professor knees, then folded body, then white-haired brain top. He pushes himself into the worst lighting possible (I have my camera with me) and doesn't move.
He speaks to a man about Nigeria, who talks back about Zimbabwe, then to another man who talks some more on Nigeria. This goes on for some time. They all shake their heads in disappointment.
I'm with several journalists and activists at Chinua Achebe's home to discuss the things that journalists and activists discuss. All are exiles from their native Nigeria, and I'm here simply to record the event on camera.
We'd arrived at Bard College, snugly tucked away in autumn-coloured upstate New York. It's a quaint little school with a quaint little cottage home, driveway littered with fallen leaves that make it look like the road to the famous Umuofia village in Things Fall Apart.
That was the iconic script from the man who inspired me to eat more of this kind of fufu. "Why Shakespeare? Why Jane Austen? Why Tennessee Williams?" it made me ask. Why is it that I had to leave school before I was exposed to Ngugi, Chenjerai Hove, Chinua Achebe?
Bard is where Achebe teaches as a professor and artist in residence, though I doubt he does much chalkboard teaching any more. I imagine him to be more like a pharaoh or a living sphinx sitting on his wheelchair throne as privileged American college kids pop by the house up the hill to pay homage and sit at his feet, just to say that they did it -- that they met the man and heard him speak of African protagonists whose names they could not pronounce.
I do not blame their zealousness; I, too, became overwhelmed as he slowly made his way into the living room. Now he and the other exiles continue speaking about Zimbabwe and Nigeria: one has turned from the breadbasket of Africa to a wasteland of hungry orphans, the other from oil wells of black gold to black blood.
He wants change, the old man. They still won't let him go home, he says. He's very upset. My cameras are rolling.
Hours later, equipment packed, broken glass swept up (yes, I broke a glass in Chinua Achebe's house, well done Tarisai) and dishes done (it is an African household, after all; I must play my position, feed the men, do the dishes), he talks to me.
My heart jumps. Perhaps it is my outfit. (I am dressed for the occasion, you see.) Or maybe it is the gods smiling on me, singing a song collectively that says: "Happy birthday, dear daughter of the African soil. Here, a gift!"
He asks: "You're from Zimbabwe, eh?" I nod yes as I respectfully sit down next to him. He continues. "I was there once when it was still Rhodesia. They wouldn't serve me and my colleagues beer because we were black. I had to leave there."
After promising him that we could now, at the very least, serve him a Castle Lager without, you know, all the racist stuff, we proceed to exchange more Zimbabwe stories.
"I met one of your writers too, what's her name?" There are few Zimbabwean women writers so I offer up the first name that comes to mind: "Tsitsi Dangarembwa?"
"Yes," he says, "she came here once with friends and asked me, 'Should I kneel?' I asked, whatever for? and she said: 'It's our custom.' Well, it is not mine so, no, you don't have to do that, my dear!"
He smiles. He is a gentle man.
"Some years later I was invited to the book fair in Harare as a speaker and presented Mugabe with my latest book, Anthills of the Savannah. In it I wrote: 'May what happens in this book not happen in your fair country.'
"He looked at me puzzled -- he had obviously not read the book -- then he said: 'By the sounds of it, me neither!' We had a good laugh. That was the last I saw him. I used to defend that man, maybe until perhaps a year ago, but now, it's too difficult." The mixed feeling is mutual.
I am amazed at how, even nearing 80, he remembers the words of an inscription written at least two decades before and the details of that encounter, so lucidly.
I haven't read it so I make a mental note to pick up a copy of Anthills, and say a silent prayer that this fictional story of military coups and turmoil does not transport itself from book pages to country.
I am holding up the group -- they are standing around in the dining room, waiting for me to finish. I excuse myself, shake Chinua Achebe's hand for the 15th time, and cup my hands to clap in the way we Zimbabwean women do, the way that gives a deep, hollow "boop boop" sound.
"What is that?" he asks. I reply: "It is our custom."
FOR PUBLISHED VERSION CLICK ON
http://www.mg.co.za/article/2010-01-15-customary-charisma
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